Attention: Do you like eggplants? By eggplants, we mean dicks. Dick Stickers.

And by dicks, we mean dick stickers. Yes, that's right. We're here to sell you your favorite dick sticker.

We are not responsible if something goes wrong. 
What you do with the cock sticker is YOUR BUSINESS.
Cock stickers are meant for adults. A dick sticker will 
not make your dreams come true.

why do we love dick stickers so much?

It must be in our DNA. You know - our Dick (k)Nowledge Arena.

Well, we love them! And we think everyone should love them too. That’s why we created these stickers that are sure to bring a smile to your face and make you laugh out loud. They’re perfect for sticking on laptops, notebooks, journals, calendars or anything else that needs some fun. You can even stick one on your car window so everyone knows how much of an eggplant (that means penis) lover you are!

As an artist - we don't get a lot of sales on dick stickers. But every single sale is immensely satisfying.

These stickers will brighten up any dull day and put a smile on the faces of all who see it. So what are you waiting for? Get yours today!

Also, before you go getting all righteous on us, remember: this is art! Plus, we want your money. So take it as a sign. You're on this page. Add that big dick you've always wanted to your license plate (and offend cops everywhere). Or ... something like that.

Our penis decals are waterproof, life proof, and perfect for pranking your friends. We've sold an uncomfortable amount of cock and balls stickers in the pass, and our reviews have always been stellar. Then again, who's going to give less than 5 stars to someone who has lovingly crafted a dick sticker in their home, just for you? If you're shopping for that perfect present for a friend or family member, our classy dick stickers might just be for you.

Here are some reasons that you should choose our dick stickers above all else:

Four reasons to buy our dick stickers

We've definitely thought this out.

Reason 1: We're Not Anonymous.

We're not hiding behind the security of anonymous selling on Amazon or other marketplaces. This is our website, this is our brand, and this is our dick content. When your "eggplant" sticker gets shipped to your house, it will be in our branding, from our shop. We are unashamed of the dicks that we draw. We strive to be the best weird sticker sellers in the business. We deliver straight to your door and at an affordable price, too.

Reason 2: We're Sort Of Exlusive.

You won't find our ads plastered all over YouTube or the latest TikTok videos. It's mostly because we're too poor to advertise. Plus, who advertises these sorts of things? We figure, search engines are good enough for us. If you can find our page or site: congratulations. You have a chance to own one of the hottest designs out there. Our semi-pornographic items are just flying off the shelves as we speak.

Reason 3: We Ship Worldwide.

Canada? Check. United Kingdom? Sure thing! We're based in the United States, but we'll sell you our stickers anywhere in the world. We don't mind. Stickers are seriously cheap to ship. That being said - sometimes, international selling can be a little tricky. So reach out if our site or shop doesn't offer the checkout or currency options you need to get your dirty sticker fix.

Reason 4: FOMOOD (Fear of Missing Out on Dicks)

Don't worry - we don't only sell dicks. We also make opossums. And gay stuff. And other stuff that makes us laugh. If you're a burnt out millennial like us - or just like that sort of humor - you'll love our email list. Especially because we only send out emails like, once a month max. We've got dicks to draw.

Sticker Application Instructions

Not everyone knows how to use a sticker. No judgment. Big dick and little dick stickers alike can be hard to peel. Don't worry - we're here to help. 

Use a toothpick or knife to help you get the backing off

My stickers are usually glued to backing cards to prevent bending in transit. Pull the sticker off of its card backing to reach the adhesive backing. You can use a toothpick to help peel the edges, or you can use a sharp knife to gently score the back to facilitate peeling. If you struggle or damage the sticker, please reach out. I'm happy to send a replacement "easy peel" option for you.

Stickers are best applied to a smooth surface like a laptop, phone case, or water bottle. If it has ridges or texture, it probably won't stick very well. So do a little bit of planning before you buy things like big dick stickers! 

You shouldn't have air bubbles after application, but if you do, gently pull up the sticker and reposition. Our material is not conducive to the "credit card" trick, so don't bother. You'll just scratch the surface. See more below.

Stickers are WATERproof - not OIL or SCRATCH proof

My stickers are homemade, waterproof and made to be in low-contact situations. They do best on places like laptops or cars. Moisturizers, lotions, sunscreens, & other chemicals on your hands can and will affect my stickers over time. You can use a small piece of packing tape over your sticker if you plan to touch it a lot.

Please use my 100 day warranty - it's there to keep you happy!

I work two jobs and run a small business on top of it all. If you pay $4 for an item, I keep maybe 15% of that because of the cost of shipping and materials. I offer a 100-day warranty to be sure that you're satisfied. If you have any problems, please do reach out -

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